Floating on the pond

I am floating

Resting gently upon the surface of the pond

Like a leaf that has fallen from the tree 

I float on the surface 

A girl with pale blonde hair rests beside me, a dream I had last night 

I rescued her from death, grabbed her from being crushed

And now she rests on the pond and I gather her to me

Another dream of a parsimmon fruit, a dream about old memories, sweet and longed for

I cried for the memories that this sweetness brought to me

And now it to rests on the surface of the pond

Together the girl and the parsimmon and me, we are here

Dreams and memories and emotions all one, floating and resting, being 

The monsters are circling.

There is nothing left in that place.
As hard as I try, I cannot.
The effort leaves me anxious and scared
So here I stay, in this desolate place. 
I must meditate on this change.
I must see it empty, feel it to be so.

Now I can see the vastness of the landscape.
Strange to think anything lived here, strange to think I tried to pretend.
Fear does strange things, it will do anything to keep us alive. 
So now that I know, I can no longer pretend. 
I see what I've done.
Now I see the monsters circling.
Now they see me staring back.
I am afraid, but not in the same way I was before.
Now my fear comes from clarity instead of self delusion.
Now my sight sees what waits. 
Now I see the anger and hunger in the monsters that circle my still figure.
Now they see me and my fear, and my ferocity.
I can see their fear too. 
And because of how I am pieced together, I am sad.
I am sad I can longer pretend.
I am sad I cannot let the monsters feed on my flesh, because I know they will suffer and starve.
But it must be done and so it begins. 
So they will come, and I will starve them and become stronger as they circle me in frustration.
Howling in hunger.
And I must keep my eyes open, and watch them and love them anyway.
As they fade and I become more solid and the land becomes lush.

The warm place

Inside this place

Away from the struggles of waking

There is a place where I can be

The light is warm

Filtered inside leaves

The old dead trees standing alongside

The young 

All growing together

No endings

A place to let thoughts rest

Let them rest

Let them become part of the light

Let the past become part of the dead leaves and earth

Let them nourish the roots of the trees

Standing quietly 

The warmth, the life of the forest

My sanctuary

The Autumn Woman

She wears a cloak of leaves

Rooting herself in the earth

She is preparing for the long winter

And so she must let go

Shedding the summer's bounty

All beauty is transient 

All gains fleeting

Autumn is a difficult season

It does have its own secret joys

Because letting go means becoming lighter

Because truth is in the inner, not the outer

Letting go is no small task

It requires special attention to details

You would never let go of your core

No, that you would protect and nourish

And so ready yourself for the season ahead

The Autumn Woman is wise

She lets go of the right things

And protects the core

She knows her true beauty lies within

And she is at peace 

Longing for the restful times ahead

She does not fear the winter

She embraces it, and so come spring

She will thrive and her roots deeper inside the earth

Ready for the rotation of the seasons once again 

The man and the moon

She walks across the earth

Alone in the twilight

She calls to him

He emerges from the dark places

Inside the branches of the trees

Of the ancient forests

Forgotten by man

Hidden in the last remnants of the faerie

He is her companion

A guardian of her heart

He loves her cool beauty

Her white face

Her changing ways

She loves him in return

His ancient laugh

Dark eyes, open to the mysterious

Dark wisdom, knower of truth

They walk together each night

Breathing in the coolness 

Taking in the dreams of the world

Feeling the growth of the plants and flowers

Who all secretly worship her, moon goddess

He stares at her beauty as she looks at a small flower

Hiding his awe

And as she turns to look at him

She smiles, knowingly

Both entranced by each other

Love and joy for the love of night's gifts

They walk until the sun rises

And return to slumber as the world wakes up.

The singing heart.

I was going to write a poem about

How my heart could sing louder

Than yours

But

That's not the purpose of my heart

I confess I'm still learning 

I confess my heart sings 

A little too loud

I'm still insecure

That my song sounds ugly

So I over compensate

I'm a work in progress

No, a heart's song

Is quiet and strong

It listens to the other songs sung

And seeks to support, to harmonize

So I will wait to hear your song

And hum along until I can sing

Clear and strong

The ground trembles...

The ground trembles 

Beneath my feet

As I enter into the forest

My forest, my refuge

I walk forward regardless

Unsure of what is causing 

The tremors

And then it happens...

Underneath my feet 

A sapling erupts

A new forest is growing 

Quickly, moving upwards

It pierces my flesh

Limbs reach through me

I am immobilized 

I am rooted

I don't even have a moment to scream 

My body is encased

My arms reaching up inside 

I am blind and cannot hear you

This moment lasts but a minute

A minute, a moment

Reality is broken for me

No longer having access to mine

I sink down into my core

Darkness and silence

Darkness and silence

Wait...

There is a gentle sensation

Beneath me

Like small hairs, moving, seeking something...

Earth humming against the filaments, our roots

The roots cast out

Searching and feeling, singing

The whole tree is singing

I feel the vibrations 

Humming, my heart starts to beat inside the sound

My blood flows outward

Creating the leaves of the tree

Red leaves unfurling like small hands curled ready to hold water

To hold sunlight

I have been transformed 

Torn and wrecked

My reality taken from me

Reality alien and strange

I am the tree with the blood red leaves